The crime: assault in the “are-you-flipping-kidding-me” degree.
Click on “Read More” for the gory details.
So there I was, innocently picking up the laundry room when I was attacked (the iron fell 18 inches off a box, with the corner of said weapon landing directly on my big toenail).
It was white-hot pain and then it seemed to go away. For a moment, I just stood there thinking I dodged a bullet. Nope.
A split-second later, tears were streaming down my face and I couldn’t catch my breath. Jeff happened to still be here before work and he could tell I was in big-time pain. The baby saw me crying and she – ever the empath – began bawling to the point that Jeff couldn’t even console her. She eventually stopped when she crawled into my lap. Jeff snapped this
I was able to put ice on it and prop it up for a bit of the day, but the pain got too great to be abated by the Ibuprofen I was popping like tic-tacs. We had dinner plans with some friends and I decided that I could drop the kiddo and the hubby off at the dinner soirée while I hopped into the Urgent Care to see about my options. I forgot my wallet in the baby bag that I gave to Jeff – seriously – so he and Angela had to run it to the clinic.
After snapping some X-rays and waiting for an hour and a half – the URGENT part of urgent care is obviously not taken too seriously – I saw the doc in training. Apparently this was too severe for her to handle, so she got the already-licensed doc. Yep, doc was impressed and didn’t believe me that the iron only fell that short of a distance. Believe it, I told her. I might have been more curt than she was expecting. I was NOT in the mood because by this time, not only did my foot throb with pain at every breath, but my ass was now sore from sitting in the lobby of “the center for sick people who have disgusting phlegm-filled coughs in the middle of summer!”
Here is the paw before I went in. At least they had nice, clean tile floors there. 5the pic doesn’t do it justice because in natural light it was so dark that it more closely resembled an eggplant than a toe.
After flushing a cool freezing agent in a bottle (get it? cool?), the doc drilled it, released some of the blood, patched it up, and sent me on my way. I should have asked for drugs but I was coming down from my “oh my this is going to hurt and be so disgusting” adrenaline high and left without doing so. Ah, regrets…
Anyway, fast forward to the day after… I was directed to ice it for 20 minutes every hour (yeah, right) and to keep it elevated for most of the day (another yeah, right). The throbbing is constantly there followed by these sharp, stabbing jolts that I think is the nail separating.
Yes. The doc thinks it is inevitable that I lose my entire toenail. And I’ll be toenail-less right before my little sister’s wedding. She has a beautiful, outdoor, summer wedding planned in which I will be wearing open-toed, glittery, silver stiletto sandals. Awesome. I know my vanity is showing here, but damn! I don’t even use that stinking iron!!!!
Oh well. The real challenge here is figuring out how to entertain a very active 20 month-old while lying down with one’s foot raised above their heart.
We read every book in her extensive library. She was the oh-so-grateful recipient of MULTIPLE episodes of the cartoon we let her watch. We snuggled and she brought puzzles to the couch for us to work on together.
And once we had exhausted those activities, I knew I had to come up with something else to keep her occupied. Although coloring is a much-loved pastime around these parts, she wasn’t feeling it and got bored quickly.
While eating her snack, she started singing “the Itsy Bitsy Spider.” It is so ridiculously adorable to listen to a kid sing “Itsy Itsy its-eeeeeeee pider” over and over again to the melody. It gave me an idea!
I quickly – VERY – quickly made a spider using a foam sheet, a hole punch, pipe cleaners, googley eyes and a craft stick.
Then I whipped up some backgrounds: one sunny, one rainy. Ok – use your imagination…
Then I stuck both drawings in a dry-erase pocket thing I picked up at Target for a buck and hung it from the top of the puppet theater from yarn so that it could be easily flipped back and forth. I put on a quick show for Danger and then she took over.
She adored the googly eyes and pipe cleaner legs and played with it most of the day. I adored it because it gave me some time to prop the foot up again. And well, it is also really fun to shake the stick and make the little spider bounce around a bit.
Sarah traded in senior executives for sippy cups and now shares her loves of crafts and laughter at Ruffles and Rain Boots. Read more about Sarah here and be sure to follow the fun and creativity on Facebook